Feeling overall kinda shit, probably for obvious reasons. Weather is not helping --it got warmer, but also incredibly rainy. Today appears to be more of the same.
Accidentally played something like nine hours of Luck be a Landlord yesterday. Whoops. Today's goal is to not do that again.
Extremely busy coming up. Want to be less so.
Proud of my city for putting up a 2-3k person protest within 24 hours of a student being kidnapped by ICE. Proud that the protest turned into a lot of "know your rights" call and response. Fucking horrified to live in a fascist state where this happens in the first place.
Tomorrow I am going on a train to my grandparents' memorial service. I have quite a lot that needs to get done first, like union meeting and prepping the fuck out of some sub plans. And then on the train I need to do quite a lot of writing dance programs and stuff for ESCape.
Went to Maryland for my grandparents' funeral(s). It was nice to see a lot of people, but man, I am not particularly copey about death. I think it falls into the vast pile of "this emotion is very large and I am very tired" and so I just don't really have any feelings about it, until Veronica comes and hugs me and then I break down in her arms a bit. I don't deserve my friends.
It was really good to see mom, who seems to be doing pretty well --they were in super shitty mouth pain from dental work, and obviously stressed and sad from now being an orphan, but they were otherwise like...happy and moving around and doing well. I helped them work on their desk some, which felt nice, and I'm going to try and do more of that from afar in the next few weeks. Also good to see Alys, who is in the waiting hell right now of her book being shipped around by the agent to various editors. AAAAH! on her behalf.
Trains were good, and I finished my music project on the way down, which felt great...and then did absolutely nothing on the way up which was less great. So there's lots and lots of Things To Do this week, sigh. I'm about to collect a project that very much needs to be graded ASAP as well, since the quarter ends on Friday and grades are due the following Wednesday or whatever.
Awake very early, but Austin and I crashed pretty early last night, so I got about six hours sleep, which is the "vaguely sufficient" amount to get on the regular.
I have three things that I desperately need to get done this weekend, and as of yesterday, I have managed exactly zero progress on any of them. So that's not great.
But I do have an email from Tho in my inbox right now, and so maybe I can use that as an Incentive to get some things done? Or just like...not being allowed to play video games? Who knows.
Stay tuned for tomorrow me being sadface because I haven't completed any of the mandatory tasks, sigh.
The three things that I desperately needed to get done last weekend are finally all done. I submitted my ESCape programs fourteen days late, and my taxes one day early. (The grading happened earlier, mostly).
I wish my brain had any ability to feel good about getting things done. It colossally doesn't, I feel like shit right now, despite having two objectively accomplishy days of the last three.
I had a vacation and that was extremely nice. Now I am back at work and it's a lot, there are approximately one hundred things happening this week.
ONE HUNDRED THINGS
But last night was BodaBorg and I whacked the shit out of my knees but had a very good time.
Possibly the part where I haven't read Dreamwidth in like two weeks and am too busy to feel connected with my friends is why I am in bedroom hell zone and have not been able to do any cleaning lately.
But also maybe it's just that I am way too fucking busy to both not burn to a sobbing crisp, all the time, and put my laundry away. It's bad.
Awake. Headache, which I'm not into. Managed to get up early, so I'm eating breakfast early, and hopefully will make it to school early instead of killing all my time on the computer. Should bike but probably won't.
Weekend was theoretically good, but actually exhausting and not restful when I am burnt out and need rest. Not sure how to reconcile that I still have to Do Things (tm) with the fact that I need rest. Have so much grading that needs done. Also would very badly like to clean my room.
Onwards.